There was an incident almost eight years ago, wherein a viral illness kicked my ass so hard I got out of bed one morning and promptly lost consciousness, before I even knew I was sick. I chose a great place to go down, in our bedroom in front of a large, very hard oak armoire, and messed up my face pretty good. I ended up in the emergency room getting my lip stitched back together, and something happened that had never happened to me before: the sheer pain of having a local anesthetic injected into my lip caused me to pass out again!
Ever since that day, I pass out from any kind of pain above normal everyday stuff. Once I passed out while trying to loosen up a stiff neck I had woken up with. I even passed out one day after having my wisdom teeth removed and getting food stuck in one of the holes. That was pain I didn't consciously feel, but it must have hit a raw nerve, and down I went.
So today, I went to the ear, nose and throat doctor with a somewhat high expectation that I was going to have a blood vessel in my nose cauterized. I remembered from having it done as a kid that it was not a pleasant experience, but I didn't remember it being at the level of pain that would cause me to pass out. I honestly figured most of my bad memories of the experience stemmed from the fact that I was a kid, and therefore didn't like having any amount of pain deliberately inflicted on me.
Apparently I've been deluding myself just so I wouldn't completely freak out about today's appointment.
Yes, I passed out, right there in the doctor's office, with the chemical-soaked cotton swab still up my nose. I felt it coming but was helpless to say anything before it was too late (apparently the ability to speak is first to go). The good news is that when I came to, after I figured out where the heck I was and who those strange people were standing over me and asking repeatedly if I was okay, I was told that the procedure was done and expected to be successful.
(I also broke the exam chair. They reclined it back when I went down, presumably to keep me from sliding onto the floor. Then they couldn't get the locking mechanism to budge to sit it back up again.)
That's a pretty good way to get out of the worst of the pain, don't you think? Just "sleep" through it. It does still hurt - dear God, it hurts - but it's better even now than it was a few hours ago. Still I can barely resist the urge to shove an ice cube up my nose.
I hope it turns out to be worth it, and I can finally blow my nose, treat a headache, or watch America's Funniest Home Videos without needing a blood transfusion after.
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